F came over last night for dinner and shared with us the whole story behind his impending divorce. It was quite a shock when he just laid it out there, especially since he's been mum about it for the past year or so.
As I sat there and listened to what he went through, how he found out, what all he did to figure out what was going on, etc., I couldn't help but think about how I would feel were I in the same situation and whether I would respond in kind. (The way he's responded would be called commendable, especially considering the circumstances.) It also made me more appreciative of my relationship with D and how our marriage has grown stronger over the years. D and I have grown, not only as individuals, but as husband and wife -- as a team -- as we've traversed the years since our wedding day (coming up on 13 years this month!). Of course, if you don't grow as a team in a relationship and learn to give and take with your partner, the relationship is doomed to fail.
That being said, just because a couple has problems, that doesn't mean they can't work through them...if both parties want to do so. (Of course, some problems -- like infidelity -- are harder to overcome than others.) The healing process may be long and involved and may include more than just the two immediate parties. It may include siblings and extended families. I was somewhat surprised when F told us that he was still seeing his niece and nephew (her sister's kids) since all this went down. I don't know if I could say the same thing (and will hopefully never find out).